It’s a Valentine day again. It’s hard to be alone watching people sharing their love to their partners, walking hand in hand all the street. I am all alone but surprisingly this time I am happy. May be because this happiness is coming from inside. May be it is the happiness of sitting at the rock in the middle of the sea with a bottle of chilled beer in hand and gazing out the white gals of Hawaii. But it was not always this way.
Last valentine I was with her. I had been with her for my last four valentines. I was never this happy before. May be our break up was nothing but required. Often I surprise how it worked for last 4 years. We were from different worlds altogether. But something was common between us that brought us together or it was that we could not get better than each other.
She was a studious girl since birth. She had always topped in the primary school,in her secondary school and now in the College as well. So she had no time for anyone other than her books.
On the other hand I always had been a back bencher. However my dad still feels that I am intelligent in academics atleast. This assumption is not his fault. I had always pretended to be like that.
Since my Childhood he has never allowed me to come out of my shell and see the world through my own eyes. Till my pre-College all the qualities of an extrovert has been buried deep in my dad’s rules and regulations. Result was that I was even hesitant to talk to any girl in my school.
I remember once, in my primary school one girl offered me her friendship. It was the first time a girl had talked to me in the school. I was such a fool that I asked her for some time since I had to take permission from my dad. Then she never came back to me.
So In my college I got this girl.
After graduation she opted out for her MBA and that too from a reputed college. I too joined a software firm. What a coincidence it was …again we were in the same city. Every birthday she used to gift me some novel…which I used to never read. She always insists for a book on her bday.
One day she insisted me to meet her dad. I said hey we meet up every other day. Isn’t it sufficient that now I should meet up your dad too? She looked at me if I had called her dad by name. I simply followed her to her house. I had no choice.
It was not a house but a mini book store. And her dad was looking like an astute professor. I had heard a lot about him from her but I was seeing him for the first time. She introduced us and went inside to change.
He started “I have heard a lot about you from her but all seems to look exaggerations. But since you are my daughter’s choice and I trust her taste I have confidence on you that you will live on to my expectations. Well How is your classes going?”
I knew that since I have to impress him,I should put some heavy technical words in my reply. ” Actually I am not a MBA student like your daughter,so no need of going to Classes everyday but yes I work in a software Enterprise as a consultant. We deal with enterprise Planning and Architecture which acts as a integration layer in n tier structure”.
But he was least impressed “It means you don’t hold a masters degree. Well why don’t you take up a management course and get at least equal stature to her and after that think of settling down. It will give you more confidence when you will walk with her. Isn't it??”.
I said nothing but left.
The very next morning when I met her, I looked her frowned face “why did you leave from there yesterday? Aren’t you serious about us?
I explained to her everything but surprisingly to me she took her dad’s side” Hey honey look at its positive part…He wants you to grow in career. You are unnecessarily treating him like a villain. You cannot do mba for my sake at least. Please??.”
After that I could not say anything but had to try for mba. I joined mba classes, studied few books but since that zeal was missing I could not get through even a single competition. It had almost a year since I met her dad and I never wanted to meet him again.
One day she called me up and told that she had been placed in an American banking organization with a starting salary 2.5 times what I was getting. The joining date was after her final semester gets over. I was happy for her.
She invited me for dinner at her house. I declined but she forced me to come. I simply went but her dad had a surprise for me.
“Son, you tried a lot to get admissions in mba colleges and I really appreciate it. But mba is not an only way to get that stature. You work hard in the current organization, get promotions get salary hikes and soon you get comparable salary package, you guys can go forward to tie knots.”
I knew this guy is smarter than me but he is this smart I never knew. Well I calculated all the chances of getting promotions and appraisals in my company but company switch looked to be a better option. I switched the company and after 4 months another company. I was pretty close to her package.
Till this time she had finished her mba and went to her home city. I thought of giving her a surprise when she will be back. But I never knew that a surprise was waiting there for me. Before I could say anything, she started “Honey I have got an offer from a research program in London. My dad wants me to join that program and its 1 year contract. Even I too don’t want to lose this chance. Meanwhile you too focus on your career and we will get married next year for sure.
I didn’t say anything and returned back to my room. I introspected and thought of my life which I had lived for last five years. Is it necessary for me to make changes in me? Shouldn’t any one accept me as I am? Do I have any identity or not? I have almost ruined my career for her and she is least bothered about it. Shouldn’t I realize now that we are not compatible anymore? Shouldn’t we move on? Shouldn’t we break up?
For a week I didn’t meet her up. She tried to call me up several times but I didn’t respond to her. Her departure day came and I went to AirPort to see her off. She was delighted to see me there and hugged me. But I was little skeptical and so kept a distance.
I said “Dear we were good together and still we are and we will be. I want to see you always happy but more importantly I want to see myself happy. We will be always good friends but not this way. Please let me go and find myself my identity my way. If I will ever return back, it will be definitely you. But for now you follow your ambitions and let me follow my instincts. You do well in your career. May God bless you!!!”
I looked into her eyes, she was crying but I turned back and left from there. I had no guts to look back and see her moist eyes.
The break up brought some luck for me and I got an opportunity to go at client’s location Hawaii – The Bikini Capital.
And here I am on the valentines’ day at Desmond rock in between the sea. I am happy as never before. I am Relaxed as never before.
I rehearsed in myself “ Few Break-Ups are worth celebrating”
